http://www.berkshireeagle.com/letters/ci_19160792
p-[teens] run wild through the halls, with no respect for those around them. Their behavior and language are deplorable.
p- I feel it would be in the best interest of the mall to propose a curfew for them. Let’s get the mall busy again with shoppers and store volumes up, even some new stores to bring revenue to the area.
c- [Restricting kids from being within the mall will help draw shoppers to the mall]
Not sure if I did this correct. But I love this argument, its been around since 1987 when they built that mall. Looks like kids still have not changed, and are still hanging out together.
Premises are single statements, and "I feel" is not part of the second premise. Presumably the author did not actually mean to say "I feel," since that would make the premise a subjective rather than an objective claim.
ReplyDeleteYour premises should be direct and to the point. They should not include any more than one sentence. Also, i would try to stay away from stating opinions starting with i feel. Be confident in what you are saying and know that the reader can assume that this is what you feel. Another thing is you might want to be more specific with your conclusion. It seems kind of open-ended to me. Just a couple of thoughts. I hope this is helpful to you!
ReplyDeleteDid you guys read the article? I was just putting these in as they were displayed in the article. I did not add "I feel", the author said it. But the premises were hard to keep them to 1 sentence, maybe I should have listed more than 2 so I could accomplish that.
ReplyDeleteSo funny i was at the mall on friday and it is the worst time to go its crowded but its not with shoppers its all these teens just hanging out. Its kinda sad that its really the only place that there is to hang out i agree that they should only allow people at the mall who are shopping but hten again there is really no place for them to go. I read the article and i felt as it was just the oppion of the auther.
ReplyDeleteyou might think of creating more premises, but making them shorter. something like this:
ReplyDeleteP: Teens run wild without respect for those around them
P: The behavior and language of teens are deplorable
P: Other malls have a curfew
P: Teens make shopping unpleasant
P: The volume of teens is a security issue
C: The mall should have a curfew for teens
I see where you're coming from leave the "I feel" and such statements in there in order to preserve the author's words but like these guys have mentioned you don't need to do that, especially because we have the article to read so we know where you are coming from. I also really like Kyle's way of putting the argument. It's a good way of simplifying all the statements without using any emotive terms. Makes things really clear.
ReplyDeleteThe point of putting an argument into standard form is specifically to omit irrelevant language and reconstruct the author's cognitive claims. You need to preserve the author's meaning, but to do so often means not reproducing his/her precise word choices. Where the author says "I feel," for example, you must charitably assume he/she really meant "I think" (otherwise the claim would have no cognitive content capable of framing a premise). Then edit out the understood "I think" and state the proposition. If you need more than one sentence, you either have two separate premises, or one premise and some extra information that does no work in the argument.
ReplyDelete